Star Trek Into Darkness

Alice Eve as Carol Marcus


Hmmm. I dunno. Hmmm. Star Trek Into Darkness. Hmmm. If Captain Kirk called to my house telling me he was from the twenty-third century and he had a genetically enhanced super-being that required cryogenic storage, I'd tell him there was no space in MY freezer.

Also, here's a joke:

Q. What order does Kirk give to the ship from the surface of the Planet Deneva in Episode 23 of TOS to the crew of the Enterprise, after he has given them the good news that he has found the cure for the Andorrian flu which the crew has contracted?

A. "Beam me up Snotty!"

(All jokes are available in the Star Trek Encyclopedia of Christmas Cracker & Klingon Day of Honor Jokes by Rick Berman and Michael Okuda. Just dip into them and put them on your blog. It pays for itself!)

Star Trek Into Darkness is alright. But as far as sequels go, it's no Iron Man 3. It nicely echoes the original movies. Methinks it stands on its own merits, but it wouldn't be the success it is were it not for the franchise that spawned it, and it actively encourages you to check out the movie on which it is somewhat based. The idea of the timeline being altered in the Trek universe so canonically by the Abrams reboot is easy enough to get over if the movies retain this quality.

So but well can I just ask somethin' about accents? [SPOILERS! SPOILERS! WOO-WOO-WOO!]

Benedict Cumberbunch should - in point of fact - be putting on some kind of an accent. Am I right?

Similarly, the Carol Marcus in the old movie clearly didn't go to boarding school at St. Trinian's. She is quite clearly a Damn Yankee in the old movie. Suddenly, the Carol Marcus Mark II accent can cut glass. She's some kind of an Englander! And yet she has RoboCop as her dad?

The old Carol Marcus, played by Bibi Besch in the '82 movie The Wrath of Khan. A few years later, her father turned into RoboCop.


Also, speaking of Kirk's love interests in the old movies, why didn't they ever do an episode of Seventh Heaven where it was revealed that the very reverend parson vicar preacher-man and his phwakkin' preacher wife were actually time travellers from Star Trek? And then Jessica Biel could've gotten into a bikini. IS THAT CHRISTIAN ENOUGH FOR YEH?

Goodnight!

Also on this blog, check out the Star Trek Dating comic strip please!

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